Over the years we seem to believe that we’ve come along way in society, we are now at a point in life where we can no longer be discriminated for what we are or what we believe to be right, right? Wrong. There could be a list of topics for me to discuss on this subject alone, but in this piece I’ll be addressing my personal experience and beliefs on how women are perceived today.
Now, I would love to write about how the women of today are socially well revered and highly respected but alas, that would be far from the truth. The truth is that in todays society, with all the social media encouraging our narcissism, over sexualised music videos and constant judgment pushed on how we present ourselves, its hard for women not to be perceived in a negative light. If we dress sexy we’re a slut, if we dress modest we’re a prude. I guess the worst part of it all is when men feel that we still live to please them.
Over time I’ve been in situations where a man feels as though I owe him something because they’ve shown an interest in me and made an offer of some sort. An example that I’m sure many girls can relate to would be when you’ve gone on a night out and had brief conversation with a guy who then offers to buy you a drink. After you physically have that drink in your hand that guy then believes you owe him something, that being your number, a dance, a kiss, sex… they’ll get what they can. What I’m trying to say is there are always intentions behind something that is offered from a man (I’m not talking about those nearest and dearest to you).
I know what you’re thinking guys, probably that girls use their looks to their advantage; we can get a lot done just because we’re girls. Fair play, but let me tell you a quick story and the reason why I’m writing this…
Whilst at university, being a broke student I needed a job and applied for sales based one. I’m confident enough to get one based off my CV. I go in for my interview ready to talk my ass off to get the job but it really didn’t go as planned. I was asked to speak briefly over my CV and then handed a booklet full of the questions that I was supposed to verbally respond to whilst the manager took notes. The manager gave me the booklet to fill out and then left until I had done so. When he returns and I give it back with the expectation of explaining my answers (or something) I was told I had the job. AMAZING. I was over the moon. I no longer had to live the budget student life. It was later on that night (probably around 10pm) I received a series of messages from the same manager asking for me to come over so he can cook for me and so on.
I didn’t go, and he was sacked soon after.
More recently, a similar role with a different company I was told in a review that I got the job for being pretty. To then be told that I should be utilising this when it comes to customers, basically saying to flirt with them in order to gain sales.
I don’t know how many girls would take offence to this, but I was livid to say the least. Personally I AM more then capable to get a job based on my qualifications and experience and not just my looks. I as well as many girls could give examples all day as to how many times we face being objectified and I’m not even half way through life yet.
I’m not trying to sound anti male but look at it from our point of view. From a young age our future has already been paved out for us, we’re given baby dolls to play with, kitchen sets and told our favourite colour is to be pink. The goal is to be married with children. But for the vast amount of women today that are aspiring to further their careers, travel and come into themselves, this clearly isn’t the route. We’re in a time where we don’t live in order to please men. We’re allowed to do what we want and be what we want without any kind of judgment.
We shouldn’t have to be called feminists or considered over sensitive in order for the male race to see us equally. To be frank, it’s about time that men learn not to look at women as a goal or eye-candy. We have a lot more to offer and to be honest women make the world go round.
On that note, lets listen to some Yoncé and embrace being fucking incredible women.